Tuesday, August 9, 2011

i'm feeling more a woman than ever

In the last two years I have grown like a giant. you know how people say your 20's are when you grow the most. I am starting to really notice things about me that don't bother me, that maybe two years ago would have. Or how in situations that aren't the best, I make the most of them. As I continue to grow as a woman, mother, girlfriend, sister, and daughter I notice so many new things about myself. I am more conscious of who I AM. I thought I knew who I was, but I am just starting too. And I don't mean like where I want to go in my life, i mean how I like my eggs. if I want to sit at home or if I want to go running. simple things I thought I knew about myself, that I actually really didn't. I'm learning that i struggle in my diet when I am going to school to be a nutritionist. I am learning that I really am impatient with myself and others and it's not everyone else. haha... that was a hard one. It such an awakening place to be to really be taking it all in.. and I don't mean HALF ASSing it.. I mean for real. Non of this teen crap. I am growing up. I am becoming a woman. A very determined, in control of myself woman. A woman who knows what she wants. A mother who researches everything before going with the crowd on things.( like most moms do) A woman who can say no and not feel guilty. A mother who can say no and not feel guilty. ( which is almost impossible, but getting there)

As I grow, I learn, and as I learn I want to learn and grow more.

I think something that is great and that I am really actually just starting to learn is to not say something unless it is really meaningful. Girls talk a lot. They expose so many terrible rude things about each other and to each other. Or how people talk to family members and aren't nice. Or when you talk to someone new you just met and maybe you said too much or too little. I am learning how and when to speak. ahhaha I thought that was when I was three... but NO it's all over again. Just like it was in my teens. I am sure it will happen again in my thirties, which by the way I am excited to be thirty. Most women would be horrified, but not me. I am so interested to see who i am when I am that old. How successful I will be and how many kids I will have and who I will be married to. Life and it's mysteries are so sexy. It makes me so excited! i love it.

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